Tales of Trinidad: Lessons to Learn

I hesitate to post everything that I'm feeling but since this is basically my journal, I'm going to. Those of you who read will get a very real sense of what our experience on this mission has been. Although, to be honest, I do tend to write from my perspective rather than David's, so his blog would read much differently than this. The events are the same but how we view them and what we are learning from them are quite different. Makes sense though, right. People can experience the very same event and have totally different perspectives on it, depending on your nationality, gender, faith, education and so on.
Here goes...

I am struggling....don't get me wrong, I am very glad to be on a mission! I love the Lord and I want to do anything I can to build the Kingdom and spread the good word but it has not been an easy journey for me. Today in church, only 8 other people came besides Dave and I. The Branch Pres. nor the other counselor ever came. Fortunately, Dave was called to serve as a counselor in the branch a couple weeks ago so he did have the authority to preside and conduct the meeting. He waited until 9:10 am to begin and we sang an extra hymn before the Sacrament to allow late comers to get there.

Then he asked me to speak.

The day prior, the branch had a family sports day at the church. The young adults were in charge and they had been planning it for a couple of months but no date was announced officially. We got a call from one of them that it was this Saturday. We asked what we could do to help and they needed the food and supplies taken to the church because they all have to travel by taxi. It was supposed to begin at 10 am so we go to pick up the food at 9:30 and by 10 we were on our way to the church which is a 20 minute drive from where we were. They had tons of food which sister George had prepared. Two meals worth! Fried chicken, hot dogs, hamburgers, salad, drinks and chips. We get there at 10:30 and find three young people waiting for us. We wondered how they got the word out and if anybody else would be there. At 11:30 brother and sister George and the incredible young adult planners came. These two young men are brothers, 19 and 17. Christian and Ronaldo. Christian is preparing to serve a mission. I admire and love them both. They acquired a large tarp for a slip and slide, they had water balloons, we played soccer, musical chairs (which I almost won!) and tug-o-war. (which Dave's team won!) We eventually had 22 people there, mostly youth and we had a great time! Dave and I got sunburned. We finished up and closed up the church at 5 pm. We were pretty much exhausted! Now, back to the above sentence: He asked me to speak.

I was very tired and was having a hard time breathing....I have been so surprised with my breathing. I really thought I would be so well and not have a bit of trouble because of the constant heavy humidity, but I have discovered it hasn't been as I expected. I tire easily because of my limited breathing capacity and after a very long active day playing the day before, I was really dragging and didn't have much energy to speak. I go up to the pulpit and start to say a few words of testimony and I can see that no one is looking at me or paying attention. Remember there are only 7 people in the congregation cause Dave is on the stand. I may have a bit of a problem because if I feel like no one is interested in what I have to say I usually won't speak especially if I don't have the energy. Perhaps Dave or my children would disagree with me but I am easily shut down. Not that I don't have a testimony to share but as I looked out at these lovely people whom I have grown to love very much, I felt like it was more important for one of them to speak then to hear from this white American. So, I said, " My voice is really tired and I wondered if Brother George would be able to speak?" Everyone of course looks up then, and Dave says in a whisper from the stand "You can't do that.." so then there is this awkward space as I say, "my voice is very tired" so then Brother George says he will say a few words. He gives a beautiful testimony and then Dave had asked the RS Pres. to speak and she gives a lovely talk as well. Dave then takes up the rest of the 15 minutes remaining.

I wondered if we shouldn't just cancel the next hour and all go home but Dave carried on normally and I'm so glad because I had a lovely lesson with the sisters. They all said how grateful they were that they came to be able to take the Sacrament and feel the Spirit. Our lesson was from the talk by Elder Uchdorf about Missionary work. After which I was able to ask them for their help with our weekly missionary lesson at the church. I told them that we as foreigners could not be successful in our invitations and that they needed to come from them. I handed them a bunch of flyers and hope they will give them out.

My prayer each day, several times a day is asking for direction from the Spirit for us to know how best to serve. My prayer each day several times a day is to bless this little branch and it's leaders to be strong and bright lights to others, and my prayer each day several times a day is to bless my children and grandchildren. It is a sacrifice to be away from them but we know it is a powerful way to show our love and gratitude to our Heavenly Father and our Savior for all they have and continue to do for us. It's really a pretty small sacrifice in comparison and we feel it's an honor to be here.

My thoughts about the things I am learning are:

It is difficult and sometimes a struggle but if we can look at what we are becoming knowing that some lessons cannot be learned any other way, it makes it so we don't give up.
If we were to give up, there would only be disappointment and a lost opportunity to change into a better, stronger creature. We have chosen to become "new creatures" and put off the natural man/woman and that is quite the process and the Lord offers us tons of different opportunities which allows us to accomplish that. There has been tears, sorrow and discouragement more than I had anticipated or even prepared for but there has also been much love, joy and sweetness which is always more lasting.

So we Soldier on! Carry on! and Keep the Faith!